


second chances..they don't matter

by Yakashi



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Ambigous Ending, Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-01
Updated: 2018-06-01
Packaged: 2019-05-17 01:08:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,253
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14822351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yakashi/pseuds/Yakashi
Summary: You miss 100% of the shots you don't takebutyou can also miss 100% of the shots you do take





	second chances..they don't matter

Tenzo felt his feet hit the ground and never felt more happy to be on solid ground. It was an 18 hour flight back to Konoha and he had plenty of time to be in his thoughts, too much time really. He left the terminal and took a deep breathe. He noticed the tree branches swaying in the wind, the fucking GEESE honking everywhere, and the hustle and bustle of everyone going through their daily lives. He was home.

Tenzo opened his door to be greeted by his spunky roommate.

“WELCOME HOME TENZY-POO!!” She bellowed at the top of her lungs as she attacked him with a bear hug.

Tenzo couldn’t help but laugh as he dropped his bags to the floor, “Thanks. Welcome home to you too. I hope you got your things settled in alright.”

Anko grinned, “Of course I did! Your house is simple so I decided to spruce it up a bit.”

“Oh God.” Tenzo sighed, as he set his stuff down by the door and walked through the house.

Surprisingly, there was nothing crazy, just a few abstract paintings and a couple extra knick knacks placed around.

He walked back into the kitchen to find Anko sitting on the counter stuffing her face with a box of cookies. “Mmfh sho we shouve sho ou laer” 

“I’m sorry come again?”

Anko swallowed and tried again. “WE should go out later. Kakashi is having a party and we should go. All our friends will be there.”

Tenzo was exasperated. How does she know news so quickly? “How do you know that? You got back yesterday?”

“I talk to Kurenai every day silly! They know I’m here and told me like last week. However, It’ll be a fun surprise when they see you!”

Tenzo walked to put his clothes away as he called back, “I don’t think it’s such a good idea.”

Anko followed him to his room and swatted whatever he was holding out of his hand. “You’re just nervous about seeing your one true love. Come on! Now’s the time to make a move on him. You promised you would when we came back to Konoha.”

“I was drunk.” Tenzo pouted as he remembered that night. They were drinking in the barracks and more than enough secrets came about.

“Still counts.” Anko smirked as she jarred him from his thoughts.

“Does it have to be today?’  
“Yes.”  
“Fuck.”  
“Let’s go.” Anko grabbed his hand and dragged Tenzo out the door.

As annoying as Anko was, Tenzo was grateful for her. They met in the military 5 years ago and haven’t separated. She looked out for him and he did the same. He had invited her to stay with him for christmas one year after learning she had nowhere to go and it was the best choice he ever made. She met Kurenai and Asuma and all their other friends and they became best pals. Tenzo had her move in with him and the rest was history. Now here they are walking into his old friend’s house like they own the place.

“Hello everyone the party has arrived!” Anko called out, hands in the air making a grand spectacle.

A group of “Hey” rang through the building as several people called out. Tenzo came in quietly behind her, hoping not to draw attention to himself.

It didn’t work. 

Tenzo was bombarded with hugs and welcome backs from his friends.

When the excitement calmed, he went to the kitchen to grab a drink. He sat at the table when a familiar friend sat next to him

“Long time no see.”

“Likewise.”

There was an awkward silence. Tenzo didn’t no couldn’t do this. He spent years avoiding this conversation. 

Kakashi sighed in defeat as this was clearly not going to go anywhere.“I said I was sorry. I don’t know how to fix this. I miss you.”

Tenzo looked up from his drink to meet messy hair and lazy eyes filled with sorrow. “Please Tenzo, what can I do to make you forgive me?”

Tenzo lost his resolve and spoke back, “I’m not mad. I never have been. I just..”

Come on. Say it, lay your cards on the table

“I just,”

Tenzo was interrupted by a man with a ponytail and a scar across his nose. Who is this guy? “Hey I need everyone in the living room right now.”

Kakashi looked back, “We’re not done with this. Once this is over we’re gonna talk ok.”  
Kakashi and Tenzo walked to the living room. Tenzo was silently thanking whatever deity helped him avoid that talk.

Everyone gathered around the living room and made Tenzo feel nervous. Too many people in a small space. Thankfully, he didn’t have much time to think as that guy pulled Kakashi to the center with him and began speaking.

“Thanks for coming everyone! I just.. I just want to say how I am so grateful to be brought into this friend group. When Kakashi and I started dating a couple years ago, I was nervous about it all but it was the best thing to ever happen to me.”

A chorus of awwws went through the room.

“I mean it. Kakashi you make me the happiest man alive and I know your name isn’t on my wrist but..” He got down on one knee and pulled out a ring. “I believe in making your own future so will you marry me?”

“Yes”

Everyone whooped and hollered as they hugged.

Tenzo was in a daze. He couldn’t believe what happened. That deity that helped him earlier? Yea fuck him. This was too much. He used the commotion to silently sneak out and he headed to his car.

“Tenzo wait!” Anko called as she chased after him. “Tenzo please.”

“Please what? I almost made a fool of myself.” Oh fuck the tears are beginning to form. Hold it together. “ I was about to tell him everything and how I felt and oh my god I didn’t know he was dating someone and fuck he’s engaged now.”

“Tenzo, I’m sorry..maybe we can-”

“No...It was soulmate or not, it was always so stupid stupid to think a guy like me could end up with someone like him. He rejected me once..why did I think this time could be any different?”

\-----

Soulmates were an awful thing. Having the name of the person who was perfect for you tattooed on you wrist was actually terrible. It created a false sense of security. It made you think that someone was going to love you forever and live happily ever after. It was a nice lie. They didn’t tell you that soulmates die before you meet them or how your soulmate might have multiple names or names may change throughout time . In Tenzo’s case, a soulmate who fell in love with someone else. It was for theses reasons, very few people exposed their soul mark. Things could get messy very quick.

Tenzo always had the name Kakashi on his wrist. He loved it for a while. When he was younger, he had dreams of meeting him and living a fairy tale life complete with lazy mornings and roasting each other at parties . What a joke.

They met in high school. Kakashi was in his his martial arts class that he attended after school they became great friends. The only problem was that Kakashi was taken. No big deal. Tenzo could wait. So he did. He used this time to know Kakashi’s quirks, hobbies, and everything else.  
He waited four years. Then Obito dumped him. It was the best and worst day of his life.

He remembers Kakashi coming over in the middle of the night crying. He did what any friend would and provided comfort. He took Kakahi to his room and let him cry his heart out. He had never seen his friend so distraught. He never wanted to see him like that again. 

Then Kakashi kissed him. Again and again and Tenzo was on cloud 9. Hands touched and roamed until they were lying naked and panting. 

That morning Tenzo was ready to confess until Kakashi stopped him. 

“I’m sorry about last night. I was hurting and it shouldn’t have happened. I-I took advantage of your kindness.I was hurt and needed to feel something. I don’t want lose our friendship.”

“It’s okay. I really like you Kakashi.” Tenzo declared. He held his breath waiting for the other’s response only to be met with averted eyes and disappointment.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea -I’m sorry I-”

“It’s okay. I get it yea. We can pretend this never happened and uh go back to how things were.”

“Yea. I think that’d be best.” 

It wasn’t ok.It stung. He was just a one night stand,but at least he wouldn’t die a virgin.

Tenzo was an emotional wreck. He loved his soulmate. His soulmate didn’t love him. He didn’t really know what to do with his life so he did what anyone else would do. Join the military. He up and left without a word.

\---

Here he is several years later, back in the same problem as when he left. 

However, this time he was going to do better. He didn’t need someone else to make his life complete. 

He got a job at a local flower shop. It was calm, quiet, and serene. Tenzo had always loved nature, it was a way to feel at peace.   
He was currently cleaning up trimmings when of course, Kakashi and his fiance walk in.

“How can I help you today?” He greeted them with his best customer service voice.

“Hello. We were looking for flower arrangements for the wedding and Kashi said you had a great eye for that kind of stuff.” Iruka smiled as he explained what he wanted.

Pffft ‘Kashi’ what a stupid nickname. 

Tenzo kept his thought to himself as Iruka further explained. It was hard to focus when he could feel the other’s eyes constantly on him.   
“- do you think you can do that?” Iruka finally finished talking.   
“Yea. Let me show you some options” Tenzo pushed Kakashi out of his mind as he showed the different combinations. After an hour, they settled on the best arrangements and Tenzo put the order in.  
They left and Tenzo finally felt like he could breathe.

Tenzo packed up for the day when Kakashi came back in the store.  
“We’re closed”  
“Then let me take you out. I know you’re hungry.”  
“Fine.”

\---

The restaurant was decent. They sat in a booth and gave the waitress their order. As soon as she left, Kakashi wasted no time trying to relieve the elephant in the room..

“So uhh thanks for helping us out today. I don’t really know anything about weddings. I don’t really know what to do.” 

“It’s no problem. I imagine no one really knows what to do, you just do it”

“What if it’s scary?”

“Then you rely on your friends. On me.”

Kakashi looked down. “I didn’t know I could do that anymore.”

Tenzo felt an overwhelming wave of guilt. He had been so caught up in his own feelings, he didn’t realize how much of an ass he was being. “Of course you can. I’ll be here for you.”

\----

Time was weird. Months came and went and Tenzo still felt stuck. The flower shop gave him a great peace of mind but overall he felt lost. Anko spent most of her time with this guy named Genma. He was an alright fellow but a little too much for Tenzo’s taste.   
Tenzo made friends but he still felt unhappy. He was going through the motions. He drank more, contemplated his existence, and forced a smile everyday.

\---  
The wedding was absolutely beautiful. There were simple blue decorations and complimenting flowers. Everyone was dressed in their sunday bests and Tenzo was shocked at how amazing a venue could look. 

Of course, he was asked to join the wedding party. He figured he could hold it down long enough for his friend. Kakashi however, was freaking out. Tenzo walked into his room to notify him of the time (this man was not about to be late to his own wedding), and witnessed him breathing heavy, looking ready to vomit.

Tenzo walked over and crouched down to Kakashi’s level. “Hey just breathe. It’ll be okay.”

Kakashi looked up with dread in his eyes. “I can’t do this.”

Tenzo sighed, took his hand and whispered, “Yes you can. You found someone you love and who loves you unconditionally. Change is scary but it’ll be worth it. Your happiness is worth it.”

“But what if I fuck up?”

“Can I see your wrist?” 

Kakashi complied as Tenzo exposed his bear wrist for them to admire, Iruka’s name in beautiful cursive. 

“Listen to me Kakashi, you have your soulmate. The person who will love you through thick and thin. You’re bound to mess up but none of that matters as long as you both work hard to get through it all. You also have friends to rely on and Kakashi you have a whole world of happiness and belonging waiting ahead so take it.”

They locked eyes as Kakashi gripped his hand. They stayed like that for what felt like forever as they exchanged wordless conversation. Tenzo was lost in those eyes as the energy kept drawing in, never wanting to leave this moment.

“MY ETERNAL RIVAL! It IS TIME TO-” Guy stopped his bombardement as he witnessed the scene before him. “Am I interrupting?”

Tenzo hopped up and wiped his hands. “No. I was just leaving.” Tenzo walked past Guy and without looking back said, “I’ll see you out there.”

 

\---

The rest of the wedding went off without a hitch. Well there was a hitch. They got hitched and that was the problem. 

Tenzo smiled and laughed and it was weird. He was happy seeing Kakashi look happy. That must be what it’s about right? Seeing the person you love happy even when you aren’t. 

Throughout the night Tenzo realized a few things.  
He cared about so many of the people around him  
He was his own person and didn’t need another person to be happy (for real this time)  
Throughout all his pining he lost sight of who he was  
He didn’t belong here  
While those thoughts settled in his head, he downed the rest of his drink, bid farewell to his friends, and left.

 

\---  
Tenzo woke up to a blinding white light and a numb feeling throughout his appendages. He slowly opened up his eyes to realize he was in a hospital. He didn’t really remember how he got here. He remembered the stake out turned into an ambush. There were shots and screaming and a child and then nothing. 

He smiled. As the memories slowly came back, he didn’t think he was going to survive. He wasn’t suicidal or anything, but he knew what he was doing. He had to protect that kid. She had a whole future ahead of her. Tenzo hoped she lived. 

“Ya know, it's amazing how you still managed to keep all your body parts.” 

Tenzo slowly turned his head to see a disheveled Kakashi. “It’s luck I suppose. You look awful.”

Kakashi chuckled before his voice turned somber, “Well it’s nice to see you too. Dr. Said you were really hurt. That you might not wake up.”

Tenzo looked down at his blanket and fidgeted with this bandaged hands, “Oh.”

“Oh? OH? That’s all you have to say?!” Kakashi’s voice crescendoed as he continued. “You nearly died? You left again. You fucking...fuck Tenzo! We had so much we needed to talk about. How could you not tell me I was your soulmate?!”

Tenzo stayed calm, too tired to feel anything, “I told you I was leaving. It’s not my fault you went on a month long honeymoon, and besides, what good would it have done? Your married.”

“You could have told me anytime before then?”

“Really? Should I have done it while you were dating Obito? After you told me that us having sex was a mistake? Or after you got engaged? Or when I saw your wrist with Iruka’s name?”

Silence.

Tenzo scoffed.“Yea. That’s what I though”

Kakashi collected himself as he whispered out, “It’s tatooed...I..My real one is on the other wrist. For a really long time it said Kinoe, but it was blurry. Then it was so smudged that I couldn't make out the name. So I stopped looking at it. Then I met Iruka and it was still smudged so I said screw it. I was going to make my own happiness. I tattooed his name on there. During our honeymoon, it was so itchy and I looked at it and your name was clear as day. I don’t know why.”

“I never told you but I was born as Kinoe and changed names when I entered foster care. I mean I guess it’s because I never knew who I was? I went on a lot of undercover missions so I was always a different person. I didn’t really find myself until recently which might have been when yours became clear.”

Kakashi sat in deep thought. He processed everything and seemed to be making decisions in his head. He rose out of his chair and cupped Tenzo’s cheek, pulling him in to a soft kiss.

Tenzo was on cloud nine. Tose chapped lips were everything he wanted. The kiss was tender, sweet, passionate and told everything that was unsaid. Tenzo would have kissed him all day, until he realized..

“Stop. We can’t” Tenzo pulled his head away.  
‘Why not?”  
“You’re married and I- I finally learned how to be happy with myself. I joined the military with a new sense of purpose. I am over all the heartache and right now this is so overwhelming.”

Kakashi grumbled. “Oh..yea. Fuck I messed up.”

“No. I did. Maybe we can talk this out more tomorrow. There’s just too much going on right now.” Tanzo was confused. He finally had things figured out and then everything was knocked out of balance once again.

“Okay. I’ll be back tomorrow.”  
“Showered?”  
“Yes.”  
Kakashi smiled as he left.

They both had a new future to look towards, not an easy one, but a new one.

\---  
Kakashi came back the next day with flowers and a few ideas of what steps to take next. He strode to the nurses station and greeted a young nurse.  
“Hello, I’m here to see Tenzo.”

She frowned as she looked back at her computer. “I’m sorry, he’s not accepting visitors.”  
“What?”  
Conveniently, Dr. Senju was passing by and Kakashi jumped at the opportunity to see what exactly was going on.  
“Dr. Senju-”

“I know.” She walking as she talked not once looking up from her clipboard. “Sepsis. It’s a bitch. Right now he needs to be in isolation until we can stabilize him. It’s a 30% chance he’ll make it. Just give it time. A couple weeks.” She finally stopped and made eye contact. “I’ll do everything I can.” With that she hustled of to her next patient.

Kakashi was shell shocked. What else could he do? 

\---  
He came back exactly two weeks later and greeted the same young nurse.  
“I’m here to see Tenzo.”

She looked back with a puzzled look on her face.  
“I’m sorry to inform you but Tenzo is no longer with us.”

**Author's Note:**

> Hey Hey!   
> I hope this was okay!   
> It wasn't explained but Kakashi found out because for a while he was listed as Tenzo's emergency contact and a nurse mentioned that he was his soulmate. I honestly didn't feel like writing it out but felt as though it should be explained.


End file.
